Why confidence is king

We all need to be confident b/c confidence entails we don’t have to worry about something — it entails security.

The Pinnacle of Understanding and Apathy

I believe myself to have reached a substantive pinnacle in my understanding of the world, most especially in the face of extreme cognitive dissonance as caused by understanding that, in theory, “everything can be predicted.”

The following is an expert from my Journal:

June 14, 2010

I experience a strong measure of dissonance when thinking about (1) the idea that the world just “is” versus (2) the ideology that we are the masters of our own destiny.  In reality these dualities are quite opposite; however, there couldn’t be anything further from the (1) truth and (2) what we must consciously believe to improve / move forward.  After all, how does one move forward when understanding that everything can be predicted and is, if one had all inputs to an equation.  One must rather understand that we are part of this equation, as an independent variable (given the perspective previously illustrated, with predictive results as dependent variables).  As part of this equation, the very thoughts that we express right now are part of these interactions.  Moreover, our choices are part of this.

This negative feedback that we are “blessed” with, combined with a specialized compartment allowing us to choose / inhibit actions (our prefrontal cortices et al) and specialized imaginative compartments, allow us to manage our own destinies.  I suppose what we have to realize is that, although everything can be predicted, the very “actions” which result in our current “thoughts” are superfluous and part of that all-encompassing equation – however, as the amalgamate entity that we exist as (the so called organisms of “humans”), we are apt and built to continually improve and sustain ourselves as this amalgamation.  We have goals as an entity, and we must be conscious of that and perform to that end.  In an observatory perspective, that is just it – the cognitive dissonance is simply a result of that understanding which arises from the conflicting perspectives of (1) being external to yourself, while (2) “being” that exact self.

This cognitive dissonance is somewhat predictable when putting yourself in these two distinct perspectives of cognition/thought, as they are two distinct perspectives.  One is relatively objective and “immune” to the goals of self, whereas the other (#2) is inherently governed by the goals and biases of self.

In conclusion and summation, we–as amalgamations of sub-entities with a common goal–must function as such.  We can leverage this understanding to accomplish goals for ourselves.  In a near completely “desensitized-to-self” perspective (losing my concept of self), the aforementioned understanding and conclusion is what we much come to — we are part of this equation, and we have tools to allow us to improve ourselves.  We have to put aside the cognitive dissonance, even in the face of such an enormously complex and disruptive understanding; and move towards those positive goals which we are apt and built to achieve.  We cannot let this understanding impede on such goals, for those goals are what we are based and meant to accomplish as entities (we are meant to improve and grow sustain-ably, with minimal effort… our goals are to maximize benefits for ourselves and minimize costs).  Let’s do it.

Chaotic Life or Organized Structure

Right now I live a very chaotic life.  I am highly unorganized, not very punctual.  The result is tasks getting jumbled; and, when I do accomplish things, I did not see it as an accomplishment because it is only a piece to the bigger goal.  For instance, writing Executive Summaries or writing content for a website is not an accomplishment to me.

However, when you break things down — every detail is an accomplishment.  You structure your day around subgoals to broader goals.  This seems to increase efficiency — I hope I will be able to maintain a strong vision and focus on my broad goal however.

When it comes to making money – the broad goal is not the issue, rather adapting to consumer demand is.  However, if you are working to accomplish something specific… you’d better believe you are all about that specific goal.  Right now, my goal is to integrate molecular medicine, combination products, and experimental access protocols to the every physicians’ care.  I need to know I can temporarily forget about my biological knowledge, and to entrust my doctors with this knowledge.  I need to know I can and will be taken care of to the scope that I wish (where “estimation” and “guesswork” is minimized).

Anyhow, when you are focused on a broad goal such as the goal previously mentioned, it is easy to get lost.  The value of subgoals is to efficiently accomplish your object.  I just need to maintain the course and get busy.  Organization shall be fun : ).  Hopefully organization shall keep me open to innovation, in some way.  That is the one fear about organization — getting used to structure so much that you forget to innovate that structure.

On to finish cleaning my room and revamping my life.

Wonderful Discussion with my Bro on Moral Responsibility

As always, it is interesting and mind-provoking to talk with my brother.  Trevor has always had a wonderful ability to talk with me for hours and hours, to listen, and to engage in civil, logical and open discourse.  It is beautiful.  Tonight’s discussion has led to a new understanding of a situation (as these conversations often result).

Moral Responsibility

Before I offer my thoughts, it is important to define moral responsibility as analogous to moral justice — meaning performing what you owe to someone (be it yourself or others).  It is this notion that you have some duty to help those who have helped you; that you are somehow “responsible” to do such and it is somehow “just” and “fair.”

Conclusion (mine more than his.. but a general consensus I think):  We have a moral responsibility to respect ourselves first and foremost.  Next, we have a responsibility to those who have helped us.  Anything more than this isn’t as much about moral “justice” and “responsibility” as it is pure philanthropy.

I do not believe we have any moral duty to help others, rather it would be very nice if we did.  However, without getting paid, this is pure philanthropy.  Performing such philanthropy past the point of personal gratification, and without getting paid, is what I call “the purest altruism.”  At this state, you have zero incentive to help someone — having no utility whatsoever; even having a negative utility at some points.  If you are getting paid, then that’s nice — but it’s not philanthropy.  You simply are choosing to perform a task which yields that intrinsic benefit (which can be found outside of this morally gratifying zone), while trading off for a lower wage than you may have otherwise achieved.

On another note:

Money & Culture Driving Us Beyond States of Intrinsic Desensitization at Work

Tonight, I realized how much money drives individuals’ efforts beyond their maximum utility level.  For example, a doctor may gain tremendous satisfaction when saving someone’s life – however, such a physician will eventually become desensitized to that utility, and will lose all intrinsic incentives.  Having an extrinsic, monetary incentive allows a physician (and any other person) to maintain their practice after such a diminishing utility.  In turn, this stimulates further specialization into practices.  Eventually, even a monetary reward isn’t enough, and a person retires or changes professions. *Note: Other benefits may also be included in this decision making process.  For instance, people often include the culture of their workplace and the people they work with when factoring their decision of whether to leave their profession / industry or not.  Ironically enough, I found that working for money at Wachovia with no intrinsic incentive left me rapidly starved for some inner value.  Moreover, working on this “nonprofit,” or whatever it is (with intrinsic satisfaction points / incentive), has maintained my work ethic for far longer than working for money (extrinsic benefits).  This is a commonly known psychological tendency, as well as an obvious tendency to point out.  What is not as obvious is the fact that money, when added to intrinsic benefits, significantly extends your work in a particular field… even past the point of diminishing returns.  Moreover, a good culture at work will extend your work at a particular job setting even further.  Each of these factors are possible reasons why we have very few polymaths (the “Renaissance Man”) today.